This book on asexuality has been on my list for awhile. I first saw it at the local queer bookstore. However I was reading Polysecure at the time and didn’t have time for another social science-y read. I’m glad I got to it though, as it made some very important points.
Ace, like most books I’ve read on human sexuality, want to establish definitions on what desire is and the shape of socitial norms. Specifically the book looks at the different types of desire and attraction. The book goes into things like emotional attraction, astheic attraction, as well as others.
Another thread that runs through the book is the idea of what exactly an asexual person is or does. Though the book doesn’t give an answer specifically, as most social science books don’t, it gives many examples of the way this question is grappled with by separate people, it goes into different peoples relationship with sex and romance. Making note of ace and arophobia and the idea of compulsive heterosexuality, or comp het.
The book wants to move away from the easy answers of the idea that an asexual person is simply a person who doesn’t like or want sex. Instead the ‘answer’ so to speak is much more complicated, and that one’s positionality within the world can effect how people deal with sex. From the author herself who is seemingly sex indifferent, meaning she’ll have sex for other reasons even if the sexual attraction isn’t there.
Other terms that come up in her talking to people include sex negative people who are literally disgusted by sex in some cases. Finally she talks with sex favorable people actually like sex, even if they desire isn’t there. The author does make note though of how complicated desire can be and the importance of dealing with consent.
Ace also focuses on the prevalence of the assumption of sex and romance within the fabric of our Western society. Everything from social to legal protections are centered around the idea of sex and romance. From the value that is placed on romantic relationships over friendships and other relationships. To the focus that sex is the thing that makes one an ‘adult’.
The topic I found most interesting in this section of the book was the idea of Hermeneutical Injustice which is basically a type of structural discrimination that occurs when someone is unable to understand or express an important part of their experience due to a lack of shared social interpretation tools.
People who are ace are often not aware of the concept of being asexual. Leading to frustrating relationship and encounters and the idea that one needs to fix oneself from how they are somehow ‘broken’. The book also delves into the whole industry of trying to increase desire for both all involved, from prescriptions to devices, the book goes into the whole industry of increasing desire.
While the book itself doesn’t provide easy answers, it does have many great points for questions. This book is a solid four stars both for because of my interest in the topic and the easy to approach way the subject was dealt with.
Amazon: Ace
Rose's Book Garden 